My anxiety is through the roof

So my boyfriend and I are under contract to get a house. I'll be the same distance from work and he'll be a bit closer to work, like 25 mins closer I think. We have a Home warranty on the house for a year and the seller will pay closing costs etc. If this all works out.

But I have been feeling really anxious lately, Idk if its about the house, or work, or my birth control I started a month ago? Probably a combo of all 3. I just hope it dies down at some point! I wake up in the middle of the night quite a few times last week with my heart racing and then take forever to go back to sleep. =/

But yeah gotta be at work at 5:30 in the morning for a class in Raleigh. Gotta get an inspection done for the house and come visit during it and take lots of photos / video for potential room mates etc.

But yeah this anxiety is bad and I hope it goes away soon...

So Google or whoever is hosting Blogger is giving me the option to buy a domain when I went to start this new post for $12. Would be nice to straight up have my *insertnamehere*.com I may look into that.

Work has been going well. Matthew and I are looking to buy a house in a few months or so. I'm heading to California on vacation at the end of May and hitting up Fanimecon. My paid vacation resets in June and at this point I get 11 paid days off every 6 months which will keep increasing alongside raises every year in the long run. 

I made a nifty collage today of Anime I grew up watching. I tried to cram everything onto here but I missed a minor few: 

I tried to make it mostly in order what I grew up watching from top left across going in rows down to the bottom right.

I am mainly looking forward to Digimon Adventure Tri whenever it comes out. 

Living out in North Carolina this past year and a half has made me care less overall what others think of me more and more.

I have a lot of creative ideas...and need to manage my time better to implement them. I wanna work more on art, creativity and my youtube channel but I never do. Someday I'll get to it.

I did juicing for 7 days straight and lost 10 lbs from that. Started eating again and gained 2 pounds but I've stayed at my weight. At some point I need to tackle another juicing reboot and working out simultaneously head on.

Remember when they said that what we want can never be done?

I haven't updated this blog in awhile. Been too busy to think about it.

So a lots changed in over a year of updating. Work at a much better place, in an office and get paid well. I'm not quite living paycheck to paycheck like I used to thankfully. But I do commute a lil bit more than I'm used to each day. Its worth it though.

Been reading lots of subreddits like Game Collecting, ASMR, Dave and Busters and Asian Beauty Skin Care stuff. Been buying new stuff to try out on my face like Mizon Snail Recovery Gel etc. I'm probably gonna start Dermastamping or rolling at some point.

I live with the boyfriend still :3 and we just got back from getting 40 Chicken Tumors at McDonalds in 21 degree weather at night. So tasty and bad for us xD

Hmm. My computer Thor is running well, great to be in the PC Master Race now. Took advantage of the Steam Sale over the holidays and bought some games! Still wondering what directions games will take from now, everything seems so plateaued out atm. Not currently interested in a PS4 or Xbox One. I might be if any good exclusive games come out. Otherwise my computer can handle anything on the market. We have a Wii U though. The new Smash Bros was fun for a couple days, but I miss the adventure mode that Melee had.

I have a Pikachu and Zelda Amiibo. And I didn't finish Hyrule Warriors yet >_>

Anyways, looking forward to later this month, cause its my birthday. I'll be going to Defy Gravity, the Trampoline place like Sky High except they also have a Ninja / Parkour type courses. Dinner and then going bar hopping with my bf, my brother and some friends.

The day before that I took off as a vacation day so I'll probably get my hair cut and a Pedicure and manicure. Just pamper myself. :] I haven't had a professional haircut since my sister in law moved and I trim my own hair normally.

The weekend after my birthday, my company is having a get together for non exempt employees and they're paying for us to see a movie and eat at Rudino's. So that will be fun!

Things I miss in California: 

• Kayla / Friends
• Most of my old coworkers
• Savemart Cookies
• Haruka Sushi Bar
• Ability to buy Alcohol cheaper & in grocery stores
• Togos / Butchers / Podesto Sandwiches
• Ono Hawaiian / L&L Hawaiian BBQ 
• Sakura Japanese Grocery Store
• Japan Town / San Francisco 
• Late night Movie Runs
• Geekup meetings (practically died)
• Staying out a lot later

Things I love in North Carolina

• Matthew / Friends
•  Most of my new coworkers / laidback workplace @IGA
• Being able to spend more time with my brother
• Sakura Japanese restaurant 
• Cookout / Fatbacks / Chick-fil-a in close proximity
• Colder weather / more overcast
• Trees / so green! 
• Living in a nice clean house
• Stores that remind me of the 90s (which I loved)
• Mostly generally cheaper prices (except alcohol)
• Most people are a lot nicer (but there will always be some assholes no matter where you end up)

Last Saturday, Matthew & I went to check out Dave & Busters in Cary that had opened recently. It was packed! Of course it was Black Friday weekend & it's the holiday season. I find it amusing that Dave & Busters carry Pump It Up Machines instead of DDR. 

We played Infinity Blade X & I played G Dragons Crayon on PIU. Plus spin the wheel, Pac Man Battle Royale & some bizarre Clown Shooting horror game that we beat together & got 2nd in the ranking :3

Ahh I wanna go back for my Birthday. 

After work today which went fast, I went to the mall & started Christmas shopping. But it's hard to figure out what to get certain people. And I don't wanna just get people gift cards. But time to finish up with some online shopping so the gifts are more unique and suited to whom I want to give them to. I saw SO much stuff I liked x_X now that the stores have changed what they stock cause weeks ago I saw absolutely nothing I wanted at the mall.

I still need my shelves put up in my room @_@

Get em!

So I got hired at IGA/Carlie C's. Back to the grocery store business. The store I'm hired at is getting a massive remodeling.
Still didn't expect my parents to move out here. They are leaving to NC in my car tomorrow. So I should have my car by this time next week.

Been upgrading my new computer Thor. It's got purple fans on the side but they are loud. So may look into better fans with a controller later. 

THOR: 

Intel Core i5-3570K Ivy Bridge 3.4GHz (3.8GHz Turbo) LGA 1155 77W Quad-Core Desktop

 ASUS P8Z77-V LK LGA 1155 Intel Z77 HDMI SATA 6Gb/s USB 3.0 ATX Intel Motherboard with UEFI BIOS 

 2 X ASUS GeForce GTX 660 Ti 2GB 192-bit GDDR5 PCI Express 3.0 x16 HDCP Running SLI Graphics Cards

CORSAIR Vengeance 16GB SD RAM

 1TB Hard Drive

 Rosewill BRONZE Series RBR1000-M 1000W Continuous@40°C Power Supply

Several Fans, cable management etc

So far I've downloaded Batman Arkham Origins (got it free) Sim City (also free from a code), WoW, LoL and so forth. Photoshop CS5 & Video Studio Pro etc. More to come! :]

{OLD} Random words from Reddit

These are screenies of things that made me laugh/caught my interest over Reddit the past year. I whited out usernames.

My blog isn't meant to be offensive to anyone. But if it is? Oh well.

Sagwa The Chinese Siamese Cat. I miss that show xD

How our Government works nowadays.

Reddit partially helped with my move to North Carolina. I read a lot of great things randomly about the state in the comments. (And a lot of backwards things about the state as well -_-;)

Places (Quail Lakes Car Wash mainly) tried to upsale stuff on Prizm to me. So I'd ask if the most recent thing I fully knew about needed replacing and made up some lie about how I'm scared if the car would fail on me because of it. 95% of the places went along with it which would distract them from what they were originally trying to upsell to me. My car has never had any problems.

How bad the economy is becoming...

How would you quit your job if you instantly became very rich?

"Get on Neopets. I'm gonna kick your fucken ass"

Very true. I still use Yelp & usually only write positive reviews. I mainly use it to look for places I didn't otherwise know existed.

I...really wish that would happen xD

Bahaha

Hmm... xD

If this is true. This is awesome. Printer ink is such a ripoff nowadays.

Speed & Age limits

Lulz. Myspaceisforfaggots.

I'm all for women having orgasms & trying to achieve them. It takes more work for the women to do so & even if we don't climax, that doesn't mean we didn't enjoy having sex because we did (in most cases). *coughs*orgasmsaren'tevenaproblemforme*coughs*

So deep & so true. You mostly only think about you. Then there are the close few.

"I want your P in my V" became my favorite pickup line lol jk

Teh Lulz

Lulz. Can confirm this worked at Savemart. Everyone left me the hell alone when I held the clipboard. Number one insignificant power symbol.

There are cops that are straight up dicks and there are cops that are just making sure they aren't getting killed on a random traffic stop.

Could you check my pulse for me. To see if I'm alive.

So I lasted barley a month at Hobby Lobby. I thought I was getting the hang of the place & starting to make friends with 2 of my coworkers there. But I had the worst anxiety going in every day. Never felt that at a job before. And I got written up for one register mistake which I knew was my fault though I had no idea I did anything wrong at the time. But it felt like 3 of the managers didn't like me & had it out for me. So when I was about to get written up a 2nd time for supposedly not ringing up a feather worth $3.99 out of the dozens that a customer had bought & came to return, I voluntarily quit on the spot & told my manager off. She didn't care & had a coworker escort me out of the store.

The manager that had hired me had been cold since the day I had an interview with her. Out of me & 2 girls that were hired the same time, I lasted the longest and forced myself to resign. I heard my manager call a customer a bitch for accidentally bumping into her. And my manager also picked on us what we ate for lunch. Plus she said I couldn't do warehouse work as that was "guys only". Most of the people there are a bit crazy & as weird as it feels right now, I'm glad I quit.

Out of my 7 years of retail combined, this just surprises me. I ask myself "how did I fuck up so bad?" but as my brother put it, "Hell, even Taco Bell would treat you better" which I agree with. And Matthew hugged me & assured me they're just crazy & the only mistake I could make is how bad I drive in Grand Theft Auto 5. Kayla told me that Hobby Lobby is only good for getting Copic Markers at xD

At least I get paid a full check tomorrow.

So I'm back to applying places. Hot Topic, Old Navy & other places called while I had my job but I didn't return calls partially because the places that I did try to schedule interviews with, couldn't schedule me during my Hobby Lobby shifts. For a place I ended up quitting in the end. I called places back and they said they'll take another look at my application and call again. So here's hoping to that.

My brother Kevin walked into my room & mentioned he felt bad. That I came out here & all I'm doing is sitting in my room, back on the laptop applying places & don't get to go out. I have gone out a couple times, but not too much is going on atm as everything I'm looking forward to is later in this month (Pokemon X, Halloween party, Zombie run, Matthews Bday) & November (Lots of movies, Thanksgiving).

I should have my car here around the end of this month. My parents sold the house and have to be out by October 15th. Apparently I found out 10 mins before being dropped off at the airport in August that my parents were planning to move out here but they were waiting on me to leave/make the first move.

It feels weird that now I can't just fly back to Stockton and visit everyone as easily with my parents moving as well.

And that makes me a little sad deep inside.

I just realized it will be 2 months officially together for me and Matthew on his Birthday October 28th.

:o I want a Pomsky!